Neon
Highway 23 ISSN: 1476-9867
Note
from Jane...
Dear
readers,
I
have begun a new series of Neon Highway issues that are to be
edited by guest poets. I thought his would be an interesting idea to celebrate
the variety of editors and their interests and poets of choice.
Our first guest editor is A C Evans. I pass you over to AC to
introduce this issue.
edited by guest poets. I thought his would be an interesting idea to celebrate
the variety of editors and their interests and poets of choice.
Our first guest editor is A C Evans. I pass you over to AC to
introduce this issue.
Yes,
thank you Jane! And, without further delay we can meet our
contributors
to this ‘surreality
of now’
edition of Neon
Highway….
Unidentified flying poet
Andrew Darlington is
author of
Euroshima
Mon Amour (2001),
a collection of SF poems enthusiastically reviewed as ‘poetry from
a twisted mind’ by NME. A visionary novel Beast
of The Coming Darkness
is currently hunting a publisher; then there are reviews, interviews
and fiction sales to hosts of UK and international anthologies and
magazines. A live performance video (Five
Leaves Left)
and records (as part of the U.V. Pop Electronic group) have also
appeared, and probably been deleted! Andy’s spoken about how any
vague potential for academic success ‘got terminally wrecked by
teenage addictions to loud Rock ‘n’ Roll and cheap Science
Fiction’. Aad
de Gids has
a straight twin brother Bas, while he himself is gay. We’re from
the ‘anti-generation’, Aad tells Neon Highway, ‘a bit punkish’.
Bas is the imagist; the sharp eye for imagist distortions of a
distorted society. Our aesthetics have always been anti-theatre,
anti-poetry, anti-cinema = experimental, neomusic, nonmusic, muzak,
the ‘die-collector-scum’ aesthetics, dada, postneodada. All that
is new, strange, decoding all codes, societal, sexual, natural,
literal, philosophical, transdimensional; this, we try to do. ‘We
have thousand personalities now and, it shows’.M
J Foster is
a writer, poet and the founding editor of Inclement
Poetry Magazine
(est. 2000). Her work has been published in Still,
Iota, Exile, First Impressions, Poetic Licence, Breathe, Candelabrum
and
Amber Silhouettes.
Her short story, 'The Willow' was shortlisted for the Myslexia
Women's Short Story Prize 2012. She graduated with a first class BA
(Hons.) in Writing from Anglia Ruskin University, Cambridge.
She is often mistaken for Beyoncé by absolutely no-one and has a
long-running battle with a squirrel with a grudge. Wednesday
Kennedy has
lived and worked internationally as a writer and performer in
theatre, cabaret, television, radio and print media. ‘Always
experimenting, working with sound artists, musicians, dancers,
film makers, actors, honing her craft and creating her body of
work… surfing into every scene like a gate-crasher’.
Post Romantic,
her 1999 CD, prefigured performances at The Edinburgh Fringe,
and beyond. She has also written One Woman Shows for other
performers, including Intimate
and Deadly
for Christine Anu and recently released her magical realist
memoir21st
Century Showgirl,
‘an all-girls adventure epic about being a One Woman Show in a
Brave New World’. Rupert
M Loydell
is Snr
Lecturer in English with Creative Writing at University College
Falmouth, and editor of Stride
and With
magazines. He is the author of several collections of poetry,
including the recent Wildlife
and A Music
Box of Snakes,
co-authored with Peter Gillies. He edited From
Hepworth's Garden Out
poems about painters and St. Ives and Troubles
Swapped for Something Fresh,
an anthology of manifestos and unmanifestos. He lives in a creek-side
village with his family and far too many CDs and books. Lorraine
Mariner was
born
in 1974, grew up in Upminster and attended Huddersfield University
where she read English, and then University College London, where she
read Library and Information Studies. Her pamphlet Bye
For Now
was published in 2005. In the same year she also received an Arts
Council Writer's Award and in 2007 her poem ‘Thursday’ was
shortlisted for the Forward Prize for best individual poem. ‘Her
gift is to reveal how much of the everyday is purely surreal and to
articulate the strange and fleeting thoughts we often have, but
rarely have the nerve or quick-wittedness to voice’. Lorraine
Mariner’s Furniture
was
published in 2009 and shortlisted
for the Forward Prize for Best First Collection. Fiona
Pitt-Kethley studied
at the Chelsea School of Art where she obtained a BA (Hons.) before
going on to become a full-time writer. As a student she ushered at
the Old Vic and National Theatre and while writing sometimes worked
as a film extra. Now living in Cartagena, Spain, Fiona has acquired
new hobbies and has adopted seven feral cats. She goes rock-hunting
and hill-walking in the Sierra Minera and is currently writing a book
on its history. Her Selected
Poems
was published in 2008 and includes work from her notorious 1986
collection, Sky
Ray Lolly.
Alicia
Winski was
born
in Los Angeles and has been hailed as ‘a fierce poetic voice,
spreading her wings across the West Coast’. With an impressive
following in both LA & Seattle, she is ‘a provocative figure on
page, online and on stage’. She is Author of Running
on Fumes
and works at Edgar and Lenore's Publishing House (Editor, Seattle
division). Alicia possesses a craft that is ‘melodic, brutally
honest and oftentimes, quite sultry’. Her words encompass strength,
courage and a passionate perspective on life and love as seen through
the eyes of a poet. She is currently working on her next collection,
Naughty
Girls Dream in Color,
which is anticipated to be released in 2012.
Michael
Woods is a
surrealist consultant,
writer and experimental filmmaker. Expert
in special photography and effects in all media he is experienced in
publicity, poster design, digital
work, prop photography and vintage prints. Also, he is joint
author with George Melly of Paris
and The Surrealists
(1990). Work in progress includes:
constructing and editing a film version of the stage play Ajax,
(2011) with Jack Shepherd, and The
Distorted Self – Schizophrenia, an
experimental film with Eliot Albers. Soho
and
Elsewhere:
an exhibition of photographs 1979-90 (2012) and Portobello
Eye
(with Michael Horovitz) explore the ‘topography of the
imagination.’ And, finally, Marie
Zorn is
our
‘eternal wanderer questioning the ambiguities of desire, the
wonders and the mysteries of the Self and the Other, the thinking
body… the body that we both are and have’. When asked about her
work Marie says:
there is a Paul Klee painting entitled ‘Beginning of a Poem’, in
which the painter offers these words as a riddle...
‘so
fang es heimlich an’
(caught
it on secretly.)
‘Should
there exist’ she asks, ‘other reasons to write than to steal and
hide, to chase elusiveness of emotions and conceal them in beauty,
crafting amulets to protect ourselves from their tearing power?’
Contents
Note
from Jane… 2
Meet
Our Contributors by A C Evans 2
Andrew
Darlington 7
Fiona
Pitt-Kethley 10
Michael
Woods 13
Rupert
M Loydell 13
Marie
Zorn 16
Wednesday
Kennedy 26
Aad
de Gids 28
Lorraine
Mariner 31
Roy
Sutirtha 35
MJ
Foster 35
Alicia
Winski 37
Listings
& List of Illustrations 42
About
Neon Highway 43
Thank
you to Michael Woods for his original artwork for this
issue. © Michael Woods’ for all pictures
issue. © Michael Woods’ for all pictures
Front
cover and artwork by Michael woods
Front
cover: untitled photograph
Jane
Marsh would like to apologise to the poet Roy Sutirtha.
A mistake was made in issue 22 where Roy’s poem was attached to
that of another poet accidentally. I have republished Roy’s poem in this
issue and of course, this time under the correct name! Our apologies to
Roy; We hope this republishing will make up for our error.
Andrew Darlington
How
Does It Feel To Feel…?
(Incident
Sourced at ‘Jumbo Records’ St Johns Centre, Leeds)
hey andy,
flipping vinyl in jumbo’s
Ian, great to see
bin a while, how long?
doin fine, I can see
how’s the lady? – oh
she’s not your lady now
stuff happens, man, yeh?
when she goes, she’s gone, but
we had happysad times though
partners in rhyme though
you & me, Ian, riffing verse
reelin in them years, wow!
how we did Blackburn…
driving down to Blandford
a high hi-fidelity weekend
Ian, crazy days drift away
what’s bin did & what’s bin hid
never forget, know warra mean?
flipping vinyl through futures past
yeh, we’re younger than that now
are you on Facebook, Ian?
see you there, great, great…
it’s only later
walking away,
no, it wasn’t Ian
it was Martin…
hey andy,
flipping vinyl in jumbo’s
Ian, great to see
bin a while, how long?
doin fine, I can see
how’s the lady? – oh
she’s not your lady now
stuff happens, man, yeh?
when she goes, she’s gone, but
we had happysad times though
partners in rhyme though
you & me, Ian, riffing verse
reelin in them years, wow!
how we did Blackburn…
driving down to Blandford
a high hi-fidelity weekend
Ian, crazy days drift away
what’s bin did & what’s bin hid
never forget, know warra mean?
flipping vinyl through futures past
yeh, we’re younger than that now
are you on Facebook, Ian?
see you there, great, great…
it’s only later
walking away,
no, it wasn’t Ian
it was Martin…
Notes From The Coming Apocalypse:
Rime Of The Future Mariner
now, inhabiting this place only in dream & myth
these conspiratorial corners of this city of wraiths
burned to the ground, rebuilt, razed, & built again,
too ashamed or too broke to venture home, yet
sing my rime I must, believe as you choose
how we stake its mouth, to hold it from closing
how we prepare our vessel in readiness
mounting our lodgings within its intestines
provisioning with stores of bread, fresh water
& other vitals necessary for survival, until,
next morrow, the whale that is not a whale dies,
& since taking upon himself to be our pilot, we
sacrifice the hyena to the bronze Poseidon-head
& wire his still-warm cerebellum into its
neural network, it is said, the source of our curse,
& fastening cables about its teeth we
haul our strange craft through gravity wells,
for our first three days together hard by
the lodestone of a swathe of worlds
we find ourselves becalmed,
becoming as dreamy as the tide beneath us
with the currents of light running so
I can already taste morning,
the fourth day we rendezvous dark moons
& encounter multiple drifting corpses
perished in the most recent apocalypse
our vessel holds against those bodies
taking measure of what stone does to bone
what shrapnel does to flesh
& what confinement does to the mind,
seeing a man with the tail of a snake
another being devoured by a crawl of ants,
before running aground in this far place of exile
where nothing is as it seems & every
truth is written in six languages, here
you must know the dead, not just the living,
yet, sing my rime I must, believe as you choose
although I don’t always trust my own opinions
I will never betray by saying we were wrong…
SPRING
MILL FLY-TIP
(using elements sourced from Jeff Nuttall)
fat mattress sun rippling
spring unsprung nettles-thorn
kids bounce contra-grav
up-&-down around
in lazy bee-droned light
silver moon-scum for
furtive teen-lovers grope
no place to go, but here
in slurpy slithery skin-softness
erupting seed body-fluid stain
dawn in piss-wet dew-sodden
spilt lager and fox-musk odour
snails slugs slip-trails under ooze
spider-crawled over-webbed air
louse-lair within-inners bug-skitters
(using elements sourced from Jeff Nuttall)
fat mattress sun rippling
spring unsprung nettles-thorn
kids bounce contra-grav
up-&-down around
in lazy bee-droned light
silver moon-scum for
furtive teen-lovers grope
no place to go, but here
in slurpy slithery skin-softness
erupting seed body-fluid stain
dawn in piss-wet dew-sodden
spilt lager and fox-musk odour
snails slugs slip-trails under ooze
spider-crawled over-webbed air
louse-lair within-inners bug-skitters
hosting
hosts of beetle-hordes
fat
mattress corpse-open
splits around spiral helix rib-coils
drifting quilt-continents separate in
incontinent spume of tufty magma
crow rips with nest-weaving beak
burry-down deguts rag-splatter intestines
overflow rip-mould sink-holes agape
blossom-green blood-sockets
bright blister-warts tap-root forks
decomposing composting depositing
devolve in leaf-creep mulch, ripe
slime-fibrous, seething erupting seed
germination pollen swirls,
torn in nettle-thorn storm
fat mattress fades in slow
molecular entropy
already gone…
GIANT ‘COMET’ SALE
The advert says ‘Giant Comet Sale’
so I go in and say
‘I’d like Halley’s comet please’
she says ‘of course sir, we have
one due in 28th July 2061’
now I hear that, across the retail park
Curry’s are holding a ‘Monster Sale’...
splits around spiral helix rib-coils
drifting quilt-continents separate in
incontinent spume of tufty magma
crow rips with nest-weaving beak
burry-down deguts rag-splatter intestines
overflow rip-mould sink-holes agape
blossom-green blood-sockets
bright blister-warts tap-root forks
decomposing composting depositing
devolve in leaf-creep mulch, ripe
slime-fibrous, seething erupting seed
germination pollen swirls,
torn in nettle-thorn storm
fat mattress fades in slow
molecular entropy
already gone…
GIANT ‘COMET’ SALE
The advert says ‘Giant Comet Sale’
so I go in and say
‘I’d like Halley’s comet please’
she says ‘of course sir, we have
one due in 28th July 2061’
now I hear that, across the retail park
Curry’s are holding a ‘Monster Sale’...
Fiona
Pitt-Kethley
From
In
Search of San Valentin
Corta
Brunita
A
row of broken houses by the road –
a
hamlet of the damned – marks where it lies.
The
path winds downwards to a jade green lake,
soft
toxic sands gilded with pyrite dust,
marked
with the footprints of the last who past. .
They
planted trees here years ago…They died.
The
withered saplings still have plastic wraps
This
soil, it seems, will not rejuvenate.
Yet
one thing grows here in this barren land –
Small
crystal sceptres springing from the rocks.
The Eight Kings of the Air
I
walk the paths of Sancti Spiritu.
Eight
windmill turbines dominate the scene –
the
unoiled one groans slowly as it turns.
Strange
shadows pass across the yellowed soil.
Distant
they´re small- a cluster on the heights
along
a track that winds its course across
the
hills, littered with debris of the ancient mines.
Up
close they tower above me as I walk.
I
stoop and scratch some opal from the road.
You
see for many miles on either side. -
the
Mar Menor, La Manga and the Med,
poor
ruined Portman with its damaged beach
It´s
not the Roman “Portus Magnus” now.
since
Peñarroya´s pipe belched toxic filth
into
the bay till Greenpeace closed them down.
The
fifth mill has dark stripes below its blades.
A
lightning strike? Graffiti by its base
shows
pictures of a cloud and zigzag line
and
labels these the eight kings of the air.
We
find a large decapitated bird –
an
eagle – lying on a quarry path,
hundreds
of feet below the mountain top.
Aeolic
turbines, like the ancient gods
whose
altars crowned high places in the world,
must
still demand a living sacrifice.
From
Baal to Jove to Iberdrola now –
the
heights send energy to those below.
Michael Woods
Pigalle
Poem
to George
Melly,
first
trip to Paris for Paris
and the Surrealists,
Thames & Hudson,
Hotel
Blanche, 69 Rue Blanche, Paris, France. 1988.
I
am the wanderlust returned,
A
ghost, barely visible, a
Trace
of stale nicotine smoke
Curling
up spiral stairs to bed
Pigalle
has finished
Curtain
call, lights out
A
chorus line shot-dead,
Line
up metro-bound,
Cold
eyes peering in dreary rain,
Combinations
of threadbare lives,
Elastic
snapped, hitched-up above
The
knee - a feint memory
Between
intervals, between my
Index
finger and thumb, of
Ritualized
sex well done.
I
haunt dark allies, theatres
Constructed
from Adams rib,
Penetrating
neon paradise, a
Solitary
cardboard figure amid
The
glitter of fading porno stars.
Hush….!
I
wander soundless into a
Parisian
night,
And
strike a match
From
a box of desires,
Entering
a storm raging
Beneath
satin sheets,
Set
sail my soul in sunless sleep.
Rupert
M Loydell
Boarding
Pass
And
here's the ego talking:
Did
you ever use my poems
in
class like you said you might?
My travel plan does not preclude
diversions
or different trajectories;
this
is not a boarding pass.
By focussing in on the decay
we
draw attention to the structure
revealed
through crumbling walls,
the infrastructure if you like,
the
way it was originally built.
How
the past has followed us:
one of the voices used in this volume
is
there only to quietly catalogue
the
discarded items of the dead.
If you read the newspapers
then
you will know that poems
should
look like this. It is easy
to take it one stage further
and
promote a more fluid approach
to
life. What advice do you have?
How should text perform in the world?
And
did you ever use my poems
in
class like you said you might?
Ready To Fly
The spirits hovering over the ashes
are
vultures circling the debate.
We
are just selfish, each echoing
each
other in each other's minds.
The problem is not deception
but
corruption. The art of mirrors
is
a lie, the truth is in an envelope,
unnoticed
just inside the door.
We are principled but not transcendent,
live
without hope of a sensible answer.
Some
are jubilant, others more sombre,
most
a series of imperfect erasures
revealing an astonishing white wall.
Content
arises as much from process
as
from subject. That process disrupts
the
poem, readers are likely to flounder.
The
spirits hovering over the ashes
are
vultures circling our remains.
No
one wants to talk about
the
echoes in each other's minds.
You
Should Have Given Me
My
Medicine
Science
fiction madness:
I
think I can see time.
Using Paris As An Instrument
A hundred miles from chaos
preparing
for something.
Life
moves in a spiral;
cyclone
trees have no eyes.
Fall
into the footseps:
they're
easy to follow.
The swaying of a skirt
is
a type of freedom.
Hysteria
(a
found poem)
'Sin the worst of her screaming,
when
she would bury her face
in
the pillow and throw herself
on
the blanket, as if there were
a
grenade in there that was about
to
go off, when she was so shaken
with
its trembling that she felt
like
a flat, vibrating sheet of paper
so
flat that there was nothing
to
take hold of, no way to stop
her
shaking, it became clear,
with
a clarity that was not conscious,
but
that hit you straight
from
that trembling sheet of paper,
that
her compassion and even her love
were
rattled in those initial sobs,
and
that here, on the blanket,
on
these pillows, she was left alone,
quivering,
that hysteria consisted
in
that trembling, in that howl,
in
that dance of hers
beneath
the vault of heaven,
that
this was a matter
strictly
between her
and
the empty space
of
air around hers'
(Marek
Bienczyk, Transparency)
Marie
Zorn
‘so
fang es heimlich an’
Veil
Nebula
Is
there still a sheet over my soul that he didn't remove
In
his fleeting manner of a breeze
Or
of a falling star?
Shrouds
of ancient thoughts
Distant
universes of oblivion
Torn
rags are raving
Over
the trembling revelation they uncovered
Before
this bareness more naked than flesh
His
comet eyes that set my orbit
The
dance of Salome
A
swirl of veils
A
command to reveal up to vertigo
Upon
my closed eyes that see only his image
The
heavy curtains of eyelids
Alcove
of my dream
Fiery
orbs that burst
Pierce
sails, burn ropes
Free
hallucinated ships
Tear
their shreds
(And
Lazarus sisters
Do
not understand the mystery
And
dancers
Devour
their dismembered God
And
Veronica
Holds
her veil she will no longer wear)
My
baldness of a tomb
My
cerement
But
already flown cataclysms
Complete
my transformation
Bones
bathed by the light of the Veil Nebula
Home
- His child – Bare
Bite
She
remembers the cold. Biting. His departure. Biting. Reluctant steps
clapping. A clicking of heels on streets. They walk. She staggers
inside. And then a flood of words covering the drum of her roaring
thoughts. They are ebony - her thoughts - freshly hatched, first
born of the Mother of humanity. They rejoice like little lustful
children.
Your
eyes ...
Your
arms ...
Your
sad smile ...
The
hotel room that has become an extension of you ...
Just
as you have become an extension of myself ...
The
alcohol, so much alcohol to silence the huge fear that pierces me
when you touch ...
Let
me disappear, in this very moment, on that field, too much
evanescence ...
A
drunk drawing with lip pencil all over your face ...
A
large vertical line that you let me draw ...
Now,
I say, you sleep next to me and I tremble ...
And
then the pressure of his hand on her shoulder, in the bitter biting
cold. His other hand surprising her, shaping a pedestal for her
face. And there in the cold, a kiss intimated as an order. He takes
her mouth more
intensely
than he had taken her last night. She wavers. Her bag! Damn bag that
slips from her shoulder and tries to come between them. No! This
kiss, she wants it. Interlaced, pressed. She could die of his
tongue. Not to move, not to live. Here. To surrender as if it was
death, so she could feel everything deeper. Some people passing them
scream: "Get yourself a bed!"
Yes,
my love ...
Lets
return to the hotel ...
There,
now ...
You
see, even they know it is the right thing to do ...
Vox
populi, vox Dei ...
Can
you hear it? ...
Pure
folk wisdom ...
You
and me, our place is in that hotel, in bed ...
So
that I could touch you ...
Scent
you ...
There,
everywhere, on these spots where your smell is a little stronger ...
She
remembers that she had asked him to bite her last night. Not that
she likes pain in itself. But she wanted a trace, oh nothing much,
so little, a small bruise instead of a wound. A bruise on her skin
mirroring the wound in her heart. A sacred image on the roundness of
her breast that she could caress later at leisure.
So,
you are here! ...
She
thinks of it when he releases her. Yet she keeps it secret. But she
talks a lot this secret girl, while she prefers silence and she
cannot say. It is in silence, that she loves him selfishly.
You've
imprinted in me ...
You
see, I have a proof, a bruise of blue, green, red ...
Melancholy,
fear and passion ...
They
start walking again, closer to his departure. Biting. She would not
wait with him for his train. They agreed so. It is better this way.
Nobody wants to close this parenthesis. "No goodbyes, eh!"
He said.
Of
course no farewell ...
You
rest on my breast ...
In
colours ...
He
walks her to a taxi. She rushes into it. Returns to her life. She
takes her hat off, which protected her all this time against the
biting cold wind in her hair. Her beautiful hat. Her favourite hat.
She will forget it on the back-seat of the car.
(S)Words
I.
Ah!
Evil God!
Ill
Master of language!
You,
whose face I do not know
And
yet the only I cognise
Who
secludes us from those we love
Who
longs to be the sole comforter of eccentrics and poets
Jealous!
Jealous,
who collects us in Your shelves
Like
battered flower-dolls
Watered
with the poison of words
Words
that we think, say
And
we cannot free ourselves
Things
are said, uttered so poorly, yet told again
Why
speak then?
Except
by this force placed in us
Strange
and estranged
II.
Thief!
Thief,
who brings everything down to Yourself
Who
robs me of my ineffable:
My
silent music
That
could link
(Which
aspires in its movements and chords
To
the transmutation of souls)
My
inner melody
That
could love
Birth
Kill
Nurture:
Me,
my love, the world and the roses
In
a single momentum
III.
But
You mighty thundered:
« Feel,
think, speak up, put down, separate, define, order! »
Then
like your puppet, I felt ardently
Ordered
keenly
Separated
grindingly
Thought
intensely
Fervently
Devoted
to the task
Embracing
my fate of a sultry courtesan
You
pay with illusions of being Your kin
I
spoke
Too
much?
« Think
about what you feel
Express
yourself
Shout
it out
Don't
keep it in
Let
it go
And
at the end
Tear
it apart:
Put
words between you and him »
How
common!
Transparent
advices from a bad adviser
That
are making ethereal birds swim the deepest sea
IV.
So
I showered him with misunderstanding
Rotten
doubts and corrupt brain mud
With
the sulphur of my fears
And
my fantasies
I
took the cup that You held for me as a reward
Yet
it wasn't a cornucopia
But
a death chalice
and
I shared it:
Unconscious
and generous
Innocent
and wicked
Providing
the arsenic of Time
To
what had no beginning and no conclusion
Throwing
in a reality that will inevitably end
What
was supposed to float and wrap
Although
it didn't fully exist
V.
And
me, Your docile pupil
Oh
malevolent Demiurge
I
told him: « I love you »
And
then I could only swallow my tears
Of
a weeping widow at the battlefield
For
my words were no longer mine
I
love you
I
love you?
Why
saying?
Why
detach I from YOU?
Is
there a greater peril for newborn lovers
Strong
as lace
Fragile
as steel
Than
these vaporous words?
Deadly
swords!
(You
have to choose, my burning soul
You
can't make love and poetry)
VI.
But
on that first dawn, dear
Before
the Evil
There
were only
...
your skin
...
your sweat
...
my silence
The
smell of my love on your skin
Unspoken
promises of what has yet to come
Dream Of the Alchemist
I
A
l'amour comme à la guerre
preparing
provisions of oblivion
to
quench the consuming thirst
memories
inevitably bring
A
l'amour comme à la guerre
drinking
liters of quicksilver elixir
matured
in the saliva of men
hoping
that its bitterness
will
give birth to the Great Work
A
l'amour comme à la guerre
believing,
oh yes we are believers
during
calm mornings and nights of fire
with
the same ardour
that
revival will come from rottenness
painting
ourselves in colours of transmutation
Nigredo
- Albedo - Citrinitas - Rubedo
A
l'amour comme à la guerre
one
only in the multitude
of
our nerves and sweating pores
A
l'amour comme à la guerre
small
children dying without coffins
no
graves or roses to honor them
bearing
the chilling image
of
the future they will not have
A
l'amour comme à la guerre
feeding
on promises
and
wishing only for those
untenable
immense
towering
that
would engulf us as Biblical monsters
if
we would approach
A
l'amour comme à la guerre
unleashed
and embraced
shouting
out of time and over mountains
meeting
our Janus
that
soothes and aches at the same time
A
l'amour comme à la guerre
(And
we cry in advance
paying
our debt to order
forgetting
is horror
remembering
is horror)
A
l'amour comme à la guerre
with
no fear feeling
the
hand that holds us
and
then no tranches any more
in
love nor in war
nothing
else than the certainty of meaning
A
l'amour comme à la guerre
facing
each other
alive
My
love, my dream of battlefield ...
II.
Once
In
your dream
I
kissed a devoted alchemist
who
vowed me then
to
bitter blackness
certain
death - sudden
quicksilver
embraces
poisoning
fleshes
and
transcending soul
otherwise
unattainable promises
heavenly
elixir
that
soothes as it deepens
my
thirst
and
my unquenchable fire
III.
And
I woke up
Red
Prayer
Before The Catastrophe
(to
utter between fervour and fever)
I
know that you are music itself in the guise of a human being, and
that you took this shape to dance with me. All other reasons, I
don't care for. And I know that I am beautiful since I am you. Since
my soul doesn't exist anymore, but became this wave coming and
returning from me to you and from you to me. And I am still doubting
my very existence everyday when I touch my face, my lips, but in a
different way. My string is so much out of myself, that I wonder if
it is still possible that I dwell in this body. That this flesh
hasn't evaporated yet to join you in the velvet of your deep night.
But then I feel sparkles of electricity under my fingertips,
pollination of the comet rain you cast upon me. And I know without
any doubt, in a leap of my heart, that this body is still there to
be a vessel for your alchemical work. And this body, a dream of you.
And the space of our dream together. This flesh of mine is seeing
you in all the beauty my eye finds in this world. So strong is my
love, our love, love. But despite all this, I still wish, after all
this intense joy of contemplating you in Nature and smiles of
blossoming Spring, to see the world in your eyes, to find it
collapsing there, ingested, nothing but these dark pools to save me,
my gaze mingled with your gaze. To bring back love from its diffuse
homeland, to its only true home: you, me, meyou. Sensual dream of
you that is the air I'm breathing. Light piercing my flesh, rhythm
of your music becoming the momentum of existence. Swelling waters of
the fountain of youth of your kiss. Then I believe again in this
primitive and ancestral wisdom, that the dew of beings embracing
each other is forming this rainbow bind, movement of one to one. And
we are endless decay of each other. My one in movement, my endless
set of digits after the comma, my diapason that I attuned to. The
palm in my palm in your palm. The polymorphous creature of our love
The
Sad Sister
You
gave her
Some
vague glances and
Kisses
Too
voluptuous
To
withhold
Unfinished
embraces
And
she surrendered
For
some looks
Or
pennies
Eternal
price of love
A
few drops of man's dew
Drained
In
drunken dawns
Like
an automaton
She
remains
Dazed
And
sated of sad flesh
She
staggers
In
apnea of you
Declaiming
The
perfect rhyme of your lips
Wednesday Kennedy
Door
Bitch
Just
a few weeks ago at a dinner party in Melbourne a retiring Rock God
said to me ‘
Wednesday maybe if you stopped describing yourself as an Artist then you’d get more
opportunities? Three times tonight you've referred to yourself as an Artist' As if that was
something very shameful and the key to all my woe.
Wednesday maybe if you stopped describing yourself as an Artist then you’d get more
opportunities? Three times tonight you've referred to yourself as an Artist' As if that was
something very shameful and the key to all my woe.
His
words slammed like a sucker punch and so I slapped him back with his
own self-
description. The room gasped but I knew I’d missed his balls. My head was reeling. Why the
fuck was I even having this conversation?
description. The room gasped but I knew I’d missed his balls. My head was reeling. Why the
fuck was I even having this conversation?
I
knew that being seen as an Artist was akin to having a venereal
disease but it was strange
to hear someone who had devoted their life to the muse, chastise me for owning the fact
that I’d done the same? I mean he had some volunteer scribe that he was dictating his
autobiography to. But maybe he knew it was his shlong she was hanging on ? Because if I
looked at all the stories I'd collected on my travels he did have a point.
to hear someone who had devoted their life to the muse, chastise me for owning the fact
that I’d done the same? I mean he had some volunteer scribe that he was dictating his
autobiography to. But maybe he knew it was his shlong she was hanging on ? Because if I
looked at all the stories I'd collected on my travels he did have a point.
Nobody
likes Artists. Not even other Artists. Unless they’re rich they’re
almost universally
despised. When Aussies think Artist, they think smelly needy poor lunatic whores with no
ears and no sense living in garrets off tax payers money. They think wankers and bludgers
and even worse…poets. There is nothing sadder than a Poet. People run from them. They’re
not worth robbing and they want to read you their poetry. It’s hideous! Run for the hills!
Better to be that guy on his knees at Town Hall who keeps his mouth shut and holds out a
cap looking humble and fucked up. At least he has the power to make people feel guilty.
Poets don’t have the power to make people feel anything. Except, perhaps irritated and
vaguely suicidal.
despised. When Aussies think Artist, they think smelly needy poor lunatic whores with no
ears and no sense living in garrets off tax payers money. They think wankers and bludgers
and even worse…poets. There is nothing sadder than a Poet. People run from them. They’re
not worth robbing and they want to read you their poetry. It’s hideous! Run for the hills!
Better to be that guy on his knees at Town Hall who keeps his mouth shut and holds out a
cap looking humble and fucked up. At least he has the power to make people feel guilty.
Poets don’t have the power to make people feel anything. Except, perhaps irritated and
vaguely suicidal.
So
I went to the loo and videoed my feet as I was contemplating. And I
remembered when
I’d just got back from New York and was still floating on the last of my Manhattan mojo. I
had organised a photo story with a magazine and the Crown Casino Day Spa. They were
catering to the Melbourne Metro-sexual. And I was bringing in three handsome men for
pamper, interview and photo shoot. I had scored myself a room in the Penthouse suite and
dinner for everyone involved and facials and mani pedi, massages for the talent. It was a
magical ride that all ran like clockwork until the Casino looked at the proof of the photos.
The Rock God looked too much like a dirty artist and didn’t fit with their corporate brand so
they all freaked out and pulled all the photos. Without the photos I had no story. Without a
story I was cast out of the Penthouse Suite and onto a greyhound bus back to Sydney. The
clock had turned midnight and it was chutzpah au go go…
I’d just got back from New York and was still floating on the last of my Manhattan mojo. I
had organised a photo story with a magazine and the Crown Casino Day Spa. They were
catering to the Melbourne Metro-sexual. And I was bringing in three handsome men for
pamper, interview and photo shoot. I had scored myself a room in the Penthouse suite and
dinner for everyone involved and facials and mani pedi, massages for the talent. It was a
magical ride that all ran like clockwork until the Casino looked at the proof of the photos.
The Rock God looked too much like a dirty artist and didn’t fit with their corporate brand so
they all freaked out and pulled all the photos. Without the photos I had no story. Without a
story I was cast out of the Penthouse Suite and onto a greyhound bus back to Sydney. The
clock had turned midnight and it was chutzpah au go go…
I’m
a regular Cinderella act.
When
I returned to the table to remind the Rock God of that incident I
had a napkin swiftly
stuffed in my mouth by the Hostess. She tapped her knife on her glass with a ding ding
ding. It was time to SHUT UP! The discussion was finished. And it’s not like I could argue
because I was staying on her lumpy couch.
stuffed in my mouth by the Hostess. She tapped her knife on her glass with a ding ding
ding. It was time to SHUT UP! The discussion was finished. And it’s not like I could argue
because I was staying on her lumpy couch.
So
I went out on the balcony for a cigarette.
The
Rock Wizard joined me and said 'Wednesday I understand when you call
yourself an
Artist. That makes sense to me because I see myself as an Artist too'. The Wizard was sweet
and could afford to be generous because he'd escaped from Australia and been rescued by
Germans. They even paid him to perform and they weren’t a front for organised crime or
anything! He was indeed an Artist. He embodied and owned it. Whereas I had become that
twisted thwarted creature that Virginia Woolf once described in a Room of One’s Own.
Artist. That makes sense to me because I see myself as an Artist too'. The Wizard was sweet
and could afford to be generous because he'd escaped from Australia and been rescued by
Germans. They even paid him to perform and they weren’t a front for organised crime or
anything! He was indeed an Artist. He embodied and owned it. Whereas I had become that
twisted thwarted creature that Virginia Woolf once described in a Room of One’s Own.
‘I
gotta get out of here’
‘Out
of this dinner party?’
‘No.
Out of this country. From coast to coast it’s Ding Ding fucking
Ding. She needs people
like us. Artists darling ARTISTS! But she crossed the line with her 'ding ding ding'. This is
why people end up throwing punches. And you know I expected more from Melbourne! I
know it fancies itself as the cultural fucking capitol of the arse end of the world but this is
not exactly the Round fucking table is it?'
like us. Artists darling ARTISTS! But she crossed the line with her 'ding ding ding'. This is
why people end up throwing punches. And you know I expected more from Melbourne! I
know it fancies itself as the cultural fucking capitol of the arse end of the world but this is
not exactly the Round fucking table is it?'
The
Rock Wizard listened supportively in silence because Wizards never
take sides. They’re
too busy looking at the big picture .
too busy looking at the big picture .
Then
the Rock God joined us on the balcony and announced ‘A year ago I
was diagnosed
with Fucking Arsehole Disorder’ as if to explain himself.
with Fucking Arsehole Disorder’ as if to explain himself.
‘Oh
really?’ I replied. ‘And all this time I thought you were a
GENIUS’.
He
had traded in his electric muse for a shrinks diagnosis and now he'd
been reduced to a
Fucking Arsehole. It was official. And then he pointed to his girlfriend and said ‘This woman
saved my life’. As if that was sposed to soften the vibe and make me feel better?
Fucking Arsehole. It was official. And then he pointed to his girlfriend and said ‘This woman
saved my life’. As if that was sposed to soften the vibe and make me feel better?
If
I’d been diagnosed with Fucking Arsehole Disorder the room would
be emptied. It's hard
enough being a Disaster Diva with PTSD. That didn't even win me a ticket for the Disability
Pension. I tried for that pension TWICE but I failed the twenty point madness test. It’s very
hard to pass that test. They’re not even taking Cutters these days. You could crawl into
Centrelink hanging off a cross and nobody would blink. They’d just call security. So forget
slashing your wrists. It leaves them cold. You’ve got to chop off the whole hand off and
poke out your eye and get gangrene in at least one foot and even then you might only add
up to nineteen points. It’s a risk. But then once you’re in, you’re officially mental. It’s like a
club.
enough being a Disaster Diva with PTSD. That didn't even win me a ticket for the Disability
Pension. I tried for that pension TWICE but I failed the twenty point madness test. It’s very
hard to pass that test. They’re not even taking Cutters these days. You could crawl into
Centrelink hanging off a cross and nobody would blink. They’d just call security. So forget
slashing your wrists. It leaves them cold. You’ve got to chop off the whole hand off and
poke out your eye and get gangrene in at least one foot and even then you might only add
up to nineteen points. It’s a risk. But then once you’re in, you’re officially mental. It’s like a
club.
Hi
I’m Wednesday PTSD. Pleased to meet you.
Nuts
is the new black but unfortunately I’m not quite nutty enough. I’m
in a sort of nut
limbo. Can’t spit and can’t swallow. I’m one of those nuts who sees themselves as an Artist.
Who will show you her stigmata at the slightest provocation. Who is married to the muse
and who doesn't make a single choice without his consultation. I'm a regular moon mama.
And I may be delusional. But I aint the one feeding Big Pharma. It’s a game, it’s a dream,
it’s a faustian deal, it’s an art, it’s a calling, it’s an addiction. We’re back to mental illness. All
roads lead to the nut house. Buy your tickets, take your ride and suffer your ridicule
limbo. Can’t spit and can’t swallow. I’m one of those nuts who sees themselves as an Artist.
Who will show you her stigmata at the slightest provocation. Who is married to the muse
and who doesn't make a single choice without his consultation. I'm a regular moon mama.
And I may be delusional. But I aint the one feeding Big Pharma. It’s a game, it’s a dream,
it’s a faustian deal, it’s an art, it’s a calling, it’s an addiction. We’re back to mental illness. All
roads lead to the nut house. Buy your tickets, take your ride and suffer your ridicule
I
AM AN ARTIST!
So
put your money where mouth is.
Please
Aad
de Gids
while
he slept the guilders of death imminently swirled
here
we have the house and just now a thought of immense beauty traversed
to
be vanished now,and if you’re old enough you say: “go fuck
yourself,another
thought
will come”. but it was a round thought as profound as gracing
surfaciality,
as
imminent as heralding absent light. poetry needs endurance more than
inspiration,
maddening
drivenness more than chic declining on a chaise
longue.
the
painting has
great
intimacy.
all is done with “old” colours,rich ocres,greens,browns. the
brush
could
have been tipped with ash. it had this anciennity and timelessness.
a frozen
chamber
of faith and philosophy. it has certain naiveté in style but almost
deliberately
so
because its impact is grandiose in its stillness. a bearded jewish
mystic lays vastly
asleep
in his bed,seen on the backwall. the room is painted as if on a
stage. not much
nécessaires
cloud the image of bed and table,chair,window,alcove with three
books.
a
washing vase and basin,a pot in the window,all painted fromout the
heart with
meticulous
devotion and the room gets unity by the preciousness of style
throughout.
something
is happening in the room the omittance of which would have made this
the
painting,with love,of a sleeping man in his revered room. yet now we
clearly see
that,while
he sleeps the guilders of death imminently swirled almost as if in
the flight
of
starling,leaving trace of twenty,thirty guilders or shekels hovering
from ceiling to
bed,alongside
him more,as not to disturb him. it is of supernatural order,as death
is
of
supernatural both,and of natural order. perhaps it isn’t his last
sleep and he just aided
in
his dream an older woman or man on their templed erratic pathway to
death. if
this
the sign of death is,it is gilded and a flight of magnificence. the
timeless patchouli.
rose
du texet
it
is raining delicately to an inner wallpaper
wallpaper
is wallpaper if big flowers are involved
not
so much behind but in the thinness of the
finely
plastered paper to the walls,dressing them
in
hibiscus,magnolia and roses,there is a hush
as
there are two phenomenons compatible than
this
inaudible yet presumable hush of innerest
rain
meeting upon the thinness and delicacy of the
wallpaper.
the dying shall be the waterfading
riverialization
of the reddest hibiscii and roses,also
lush
rosa and sinister red,and magnificent magnolia
asian
pinks in appearances,all these colours now
a
carousel of death. and thus death rained in and
the
slowly fading and with sinewy fingers inter
mixxing
petals and colours and stamen and scent
wafted
towards an areal vessel as perfumed as
half
sensible in her flight,the halfzen vessel of
death,in
due time,to not too much dishevel the
living
and those,who still had some tasks at hand,
perhaps
a repair of the flowery wallpaper,after
all
inner rains were subdued,stilled somewhat
living
in the trafficpretzel of unaromatherapycoloured steelhulled rapid s
of erythrocites
o.k.
i will make a NASA map of this here and there of freeways and lanes
and antivegetational
graphite
labyrinths for the beetle like drone and persistence with which
these gleaming post
homoeopathic
monsters started and actually,pertained to ride,glide,staccato heavy
humming
of
5000 kg bumblebees. at night you heard individuality within the cars
prodding forth in the
endless
night,however sometimes threesomes or flotsams of easy nightsurfers
neglecting
trafficlights
to define the zanzibarian loneliness of the only rider on an endless
boring offblack
composite
asphalt,reducing roar and thereby blandening the driving
endeavour,that you now
were
a shusher at night,a hustler,an unobtrusive hooker,an ignorant
vector in the urban statistics.
travelling
became featureless now even with highest highrises or skeletonnest
bridges and
aluminiumnized
museums billbaoized titangleaming facettoid flyeye museal
expositions one
trafficdrone
over the northern hemisphere. geiger corrections showed slowly
fractionationleasions
and
extractive metallurgic progressions,disaggregated
oreholes,destabilized earthconventionality.
“FIRST
STAGE CRUSHING is generally by JAW, GYRATORY or CONE CRUSHERS,
depending upon
the
tensional strength of the rock. Crushing capacity can be predicted
from testing data from
BRAZILIAN
TESTS and UNIAXIAL COMPRESSIVE TESTS, or SCHMIDT HAMMER tests. It is
important
that
all rock types that will be fed through the concentrator are tested.
Many new beneficiation
plants
have found themselves to be short of crushing and grinding capacity
because they tested
an
average grade ore and paid little attention to the rock type, or
failed to recognize a siliceous cap
that
dominated production for the first several years.” we have abided
with these schemes and
the
way now shall be builded following the 1974 plans and this is yet
the best for us all,all is always
alright
everywhere at all time and at all costs,all is true,safe and
prosperous,beneficial for earth
and
obscurest of plants. with this we can comply finally,the
tenfoldening of the traffic so,that some
days
ago in the “botlek” i said to the driver,it looks like sao paulo
and mexico city and that,was such
marvellous
feeling,of globality,mafia,pantzercars and panterwhores,fences and
canaille,so
sweet
lou
rivera motel
this
is the motel where we take new responsibilities and,looking into the
bering,see,
that
these depths and that furor also are present in us yet have the same
indiscernability
the
same profundity but with a kind of soothing valuelessness,just its’
being there,very
bering,menacing
and changing with the minute,to which anchor
what
certainty would
arise,in
the fuming broiling mass of froth and lost ponds,undersea rivers and
pipeworms,
galaxies
of protuberance and cystic cyclicity,pain and the pain
overwhelmingly awashed
with
the acrid salinity,in this motel in dutch harbor. all meteorologic
conditions are gruelling,
job
perspectives gruelling,social mobility interesting. there is the
great absence of alaska,
being
so desparately empty,as it is called placated with words the inuit
and alaskans hate,
it
is what it is,this big realm of naturality,and even not that,all
attribuations fall short,better
to
ditch up some found poems under the lychencovered grounds and just
above the perma
frostlayer.
cold poems of blubberfood and windshiftings,short seasons save the
eternal
borealis
winter. temperatures like vectors on a grid between which maze we
can climb
hollow
and sparse trees,from
within,higher,higher,as
the conditions strangify by the minute.
squirrels
have squatted here. in the h/m/otel of m/h/ysteria we learn that
there are the empty rooms
for
anti-aliasing or birefrigerence,but also restylane ®,botox
®,tupperware ® and agent
provocateur
® and princesse
tamtam
® parties,that there are rooms for gazing at the wall,
experiencing
some outerbody fluidisizing,floating,in the void in the void of
alaska
unalaska.
actually
it only seems that there are nothing but empty rooms in the lou
rivera motel. couple
of
researchers always,the
lost pilot,a
cameramember of “the deadliest catch”. absence of
mentors
elemental in the distracted,disheveled yet also strangely
comforting,nondemanding
athmosphere
in the hotel. it became an acenter of sorts for full body and
contact and mental
floating
and putteth unalaska on the map for the seoul? 2014 olympics.
nothing to loose here
bc
all was already lost. alaskan nature so oversatiating nothing keeps
left for fancy desires but
surviving
and sashaying in your anoraks. and it is so filling that there
simply is no room for antics
other
than zonous floating exploring lightblottage the thinness of
stranded hairs entangled
just
so on the silken midaregami reminescing cushioned silkcovered black
bedaccoutrement.
a
blackness gleaning with the moiré pattern not to anti-aliasize
feature of simply,beauty like
the
surfacetension on the glass water reflecting minute flutterings of
light due to small coils
of
wind. this is the matter-antimatter of visionary floating. we see
the “worldness” of the world,
we’re
“becoming world”(deleuze-guattari). so we reached in this motel
the echelon trance,
as
the physical household with all kind of alcoves,niches,the empty
rooms,sexy waittresses,
sexy
bellboys,all to learn to still the desires of linwood and aad and
jack and carolyn and tara,
y’know?
but also the meticulously inlaid tables with
ebony,mahogeny,rosewood,pearwood
and
eucalyptus flagplates of inlaid mosaics,with that fine rough
texture,where you can easily
put
your lass of peachjuice and peacetea and hardcore liquor at and it
doesn’t shift. the greenly
gilded
kitch boots with ink neonite light,to replenish the eighties with
bandanas,yoga de luxe
and
loveboat reruns,that harsh acrid blue colour splashed around in this
motel with vibes of
“calneva
lodge”. and thère we would learn floating? we’re already doing
it,searching for tiny
meaninglenettes
and sense in a world that is just cascading and loaded with
cyclicity in an
amplitudinous
race timeless,while the gravity of the iron basalt granite planet
draws us back
into
shape,until we fall apart in quite arresting funiculary shapes of
skeletons and skulls pearly
brésil
an
interval of draught through the house. weather as ominous as
yesterday,
heat
builded up in certain domestic areas and,after dinner,inside the
inner temple
as
well,a hot head,a hot belly,cayenne pepper abundance. the draught
brings
“world”
in,in whichever not a
priori
humane fields of energy. the windows bring
the
world in,as well as keeping it out. the world seeps in in the house
as the mould
already
had annexed quite some stretches. a resolute contrameasurement is to
mix
chlorine into your latex where it otherwise had been water. first
you hoover
your
walls ad
absurdum,that
is,the affected spots. then you slap with loose hands
and
the brush the chlorified not glorified latex onto the
rims,walls,stretches,dotted
areas.
if your mood either or your condition is weak a lot of drip is gonna
fall indoors
and
it aint transparent. you had me slapping inthe weakest ways possible
just to
arrest
and halt the mould. now we have a tokyoite avantgarde architectural
house
with
dots white on white. i am weak. the mould now becomes satiated with
chlorine
and
in the background a bossanova. it is inside as well as outside. in
my world brazil
is
always near as is sicily. there are no borders,just the oceans and
the continents.
both
teaming with life and chemification,also due to the high usage of
chlorine and
ammonia
and lead and acrylate debris. i had to let it go to come through the
day.
the
trend of tropicalismú furthers. FFWD. the brazilianization is
inevitable,combining
modern
complexity with tropical laisser
passez,out
of a deep knowledge that spots
are
there,if we are there. sleep,slap and swallow all pride,it is just
going fast forward
Lorraine
Mariner
Austerity
measures
We
tightened our belts
but
still our trousers
dragged
on the pavement
tripping
us up.
140
characters
your
brain may dribble out of your ear and this town is full of tightly
dressed women with Twitter accounts so do not get drunk without me
Factory
So
I tried to shut that factory down. Laid off
all
those operatives who’d been working in my head
non-stop
constructing your good name.
Explained
that times were hard and my heart
was
even harder. Disassembly wasn’t as easy
as
I’d imagined. They formed a union,
turned
up as usual the next day, said they’d accept
a
three day week, half-pay. Insisted this
was
the best job they’d ever had
Monkey
You
came back to me today
after
30 years when from
his
swivel chair my colleague
offered
peanuts still in their shells
to
me in my swivel chair.
Suddenly
I was back
with
my top school infant class
standing
in front of your cage
to
watch you squatting
on
your branch, chewing your food,
which
you then decided to spit at us.
You
hit our teacher
who
found you hilarious.
You
also hit me and that evening
my
mother spent what seemed
like
an hour combing
congealed
nut out of my hair.
Was
that your party piece
or
some animal kingdom
warning
lost on us?
Belligerent
monkey,
my
colleague has got peanut husks
all
over the carpet around his desk
and
tomorrow morning
before
we arrive, somebody
from
another country
will
hoover them up.
Toll
booth attendant
It
might look
like
the worst job
on
earth
sitting
in a booth
on
a motorway
collecting
money
so
a car
can
go over
a
bridge
but
the snatches
of
music
you
would hear
as
the windows
roll
down
and
back up –
somebody’s
favourite
driving
song,
a
sonata,
a
hit played
on
Radio 2
caught
in
intermittent
blasts
or
suddenly
something
you
have never
heard
before
so
beautiful
that
your soul
begins
to lift
then
it’s gone
foot
down
crossing
the river.
Roy Sutirtha
Van den Budenmayer
Of
Course I didn’t meet the man near
Marble
Arch at Hyde Park on an idle
Sunday
afternoon, precisely at four p.m.
Nor
did he shake my hand or, lift the
dark
felt hat, before he could take a
bow
and scrape. But I always knew that
He
was the one - the invisible maestro,
the
Dutch who loved waltz, red tulips,
merlot
fragrance, sometimes fresh
Polish
scones,–
certainly
life above all.
And
only
He
could capture the immense beauty
of
time and space silently flowing like rain
beyond
the grey-scale, - perceptively limned
ever
by him – the eternal Van den Budenmayer.
M
J Foster
Bookshop
Beyond
thrilling, entire spaces
Of
imagination captured, scents
Of
paper, sweat and ink sear the nostrils
Keeping
memories and anticipation alive
Sensual
and electrifying as new love
Hopes
and dreams and the intimacy
Of
another being’s thoughts, their grainy
Perfume
consumes and we, the reader, submit.
Pearls
Proud
fingers now fasten
and
smooth
the
golden strands
a
wave
of
stale perfume and age
the
neck stretches
just
a little longer
the
head lifts
stronger
the
eyes
whirlpool
grey
clear
and confident
an
illusion of grandeur
Cocktails
and cotillions
a
sense of belonging
Release
When
I pretended I knew you
You
were the Sun
and
I was blind
The
Ice Wharf
Near
full moon
the
blank sky
snatches
lengths
of
the creaking cracking oak
delicate
but
deadly
to
the fearful foot
not
diamonds but
daggers
Alicia
Winski
City
Driving
Driving in the city--
a precarious past time these days
With so many highways to choose,
I always seem to lose my sense of direction on roads
of such complexion I find it difficult to turn around
and recover my original point of destination
Despite high tech maps and my fully charged GPS,
I find myself frequently traveling down a one-way street
so charming, so inviting with a nuance so enticing,
one would never know it was littered with dangerous
road hazards and
with so little fuel in my reserve, it's far too precious to expend
on a street with a dead-end leaving me befuddled; bemused
as to why I always choose
the wrong road
Driving in the city--
a precarious past time these days
With so many highways to choose,
I always seem to lose my sense of direction on roads
of such complexion I find it difficult to turn around
and recover my original point of destination
Despite high tech maps and my fully charged GPS,
I find myself frequently traveling down a one-way street
so charming, so inviting with a nuance so enticing,
one would never know it was littered with dangerous
road hazards and
with so little fuel in my reserve, it's far too precious to expend
on a street with a dead-end leaving me befuddled; bemused
as to why I always choose
the wrong road
A
Winter State of Mind
gray cracked concrete saturated under icy torrents drenching early morning risers in cold anonymity; sunny outlooks washed away as litter down dank street gutters, released into city drains hoarding dark secrets
hearts fall hard in the rain,
when exposed to
optimisms defeated, victories of the angry mother heralded by harbor horns in sing-a-long with a herd of sea lions barking in protest against buoyant steel intruders polluting a rapidly diminishing habitat
hearts fall hard
when torn asunder,
assaulted by realities depicted in the form of digital lives, victims of a sea gone mad in a killing spree incited by eruptions of anger and thunder unleashed by a shaky, outraged ground under once complacent feet
never to know complacency again
hearts fall hard
when shattered,
a safe haven in rebellion against catastrophic indignities inflicted upon it by kami-kaze engineers annihilating the purity of our garden, damning early summer blossoms and gently aging falls to a silent season
hearts fall hard under
the weight of silence
leaving me shell-shocked, apathy jarred, a single spring
larva cocooned behind secured doors and haunting music, combing through bright memories stored away to relieve the sorrow of a rainy day, safely confined where
hearts fall broken, lost --
to a winter state of mind
apr 1/apr 2 2011 (written after the Japanese tsunami)
gray cracked concrete saturated under icy torrents drenching early morning risers in cold anonymity; sunny outlooks washed away as litter down dank street gutters, released into city drains hoarding dark secrets
hearts fall hard in the rain,
when exposed to
optimisms defeated, victories of the angry mother heralded by harbor horns in sing-a-long with a herd of sea lions barking in protest against buoyant steel intruders polluting a rapidly diminishing habitat
hearts fall hard
when torn asunder,
assaulted by realities depicted in the form of digital lives, victims of a sea gone mad in a killing spree incited by eruptions of anger and thunder unleashed by a shaky, outraged ground under once complacent feet
never to know complacency again
hearts fall hard
when shattered,
a safe haven in rebellion against catastrophic indignities inflicted upon it by kami-kaze engineers annihilating the purity of our garden, damning early summer blossoms and gently aging falls to a silent season
hearts fall hard under
the weight of silence
leaving me shell-shocked, apathy jarred, a single spring
larva cocooned behind secured doors and haunting music, combing through bright memories stored away to relieve the sorrow of a rainy day, safely confined where
hearts fall broken, lost --
to a winter state of mind
apr 1/apr 2 2011 (written after the Japanese tsunami)
~The
Wednesday Night Special~
(choices)
No, a slow, lengthy demise does not inspire pride
for Death is not proud
It's hold is long and strong
with a grip on your throat
allowing just enough air to breath
with just enough suffocation
to give you the delectable little
taste of nothingness you long for
in the dark when you know
you can't take any more
The question is,
what would you prefer, Monsieur?
Suffocation, with a hint of life seasoning
or the soup du' jour;
a carefully concocted creation
offering sweet release, pain-free salvation
while bypassing a god
in whom so few believe--
It's your choice; ask—
and ye shall receive
Wednesday Blue Plate Special
Pentobarbitol --- $275
Morphine --- $100
Xanax --- $50
Amobarbital --- $47
Valium --- $30
Nembutal --- $30
Secondal --- $25
(choices)
No, a slow, lengthy demise does not inspire pride
for Death is not proud
It's hold is long and strong
with a grip on your throat
allowing just enough air to breath
with just enough suffocation
to give you the delectable little
taste of nothingness you long for
in the dark when you know
you can't take any more
The question is,
what would you prefer, Monsieur?
Suffocation, with a hint of life seasoning
or the soup du' jour;
a carefully concocted creation
offering sweet release, pain-free salvation
while bypassing a god
in whom so few believe--
It's your choice; ask—
and ye shall receive
Wednesday Blue Plate Special
Pentobarbitol --- $275
Morphine --- $100
Xanax --- $50
Amobarbital --- $47
Valium --- $30
Nembutal --- $30
Secondal --- $25
La Petite Mort
… why, why, why did you need him?
where was I? just how close to you is he?** (from Kandi by One Eskimo)
you, you were far, far away and he--
he was close, oh, so close and he--
he looks in my eyes and he--
he calls me baby and he--
he makes me want to drop where I stand
and he takes me and he breaks me
all night long
he burns me from the inside out and he
rips the flesh from my bones with his teeth
and he gets me sticky and sweet, licking me
clean as he calls me
baby, baby, baby
all night long
he sings his whiskey warm song in my ear,
it’s good, oh so good and he--
he smolders when he looks at me and he
pours his dirty little secrets into my mouth
drowning me in a flood to my senses as he
overwhelms me with his
baby, baby, baby
all night long and he—
he says all I’ve been afraid to hear and he--
he turns me to liquid, sipping from this deep,
deep well until it implodes, touching me in places
you can’t reach and I die a little death with him
all night long
baby, baby, baby
all night long
all night long
all night long
Elements
It's a cold earth you roam, lost in yourself,
lost to humanity, lost to love--
your steps ponderous, immune to the scalding ground
quivering beneath scornful feet, immune to the fires
you vanquish with a frigid glance
Have you not witnessed the fury of an erupting volcano?
Have you never been singed by the heat of lava flowing
through dry fissures in its race to meet the sea?
Fire
Water
Opposing elements in a violent clashing, creating
between them a stealthy mist, an insidious vapor
slipping in and out of one's thoughts, melding
in that volatile place where
Moisture begets moisture, where
all water flows
in the same direction
Singular slow trickles deceptively mild, conjoined,
high velocity currents sweeping lone, abandoned hulls
into roiling seas, flooding the void between them,
saturating, expanding dry tinder rocked wildly
beneath the weight of healing waters
leaving a finite voyage softly concluded
Exhausted vagabond vessels washed up onto gritty terrain
surfeited, becalmed, left simmering under a sunburst glare
all water flows
in the same direction, while steam
rises …
It's a cold earth you roam, lost in yourself,
lost to humanity, lost to love--
your steps ponderous, immune to the scalding ground
quivering beneath scornful feet, immune to the fires
you vanquish with a frigid glance
Have you not witnessed the fury of an erupting volcano?
Have you never been singed by the heat of lava flowing
through dry fissures in its race to meet the sea?
Fire
Water
Opposing elements in a violent clashing, creating
between them a stealthy mist, an insidious vapor
slipping in and out of one's thoughts, melding
in that volatile place where
Moisture begets moisture, where
all water flows
in the same direction
Singular slow trickles deceptively mild, conjoined,
high velocity currents sweeping lone, abandoned hulls
into roiling seas, flooding the void between them,
saturating, expanding dry tinder rocked wildly
beneath the weight of healing waters
leaving a finite voyage softly concluded
Exhausted vagabond vessels washed up onto gritty terrain
surfeited, becalmed, left simmering under a sunburst glare
all water flows
in the same direction, while steam
rises …
Listings
Andrew
Darlington
http://andrewdarlington.blogspot.co.uk/
Euroshima
Mon Amour. Hilltop Press. 2001
I
Was Elvis Presley’s Bastard Love-Child. Critical Vision, 2002
MJ
Foster
http://www.inclementpoetrymagazine.webs.com/
Inclement
Poetry For The Modern Soul (Ed.) 2000-
Aad
de Gids
http://keithalanhamilton.com/portfolio/AaddeGids/Default.html
Wednesday
Kennedy
http://www.wednesdaykennedyink.com/
Cultural
Refugee (performance) 2000
Last
Night In New York (multimedia show) 2001-2003
The
Myspace Diaries. Oko-Jumu Press, 2009
The
Myspace Diaries. Oko-Jumu Press, 2011
21st
Century Showgirl. Oko-Jumu Press, 2012
Rupert
M Loydell
http://www.stridemagazine.co.uk/
Troubles
Swapped for Something Fresh (Ed.). Salt Publishing, 2009
From
Hepworth's Garden Out (Ed.). Shearsman Books, 2010
A
Music Box of Snakes (with Peter Gillies). Knives, Forks & Spoons
Press, 2010
Smartarse
(Ed.) Knives Forks & Spoons Press, 2011
Wildlife.
Shearsman Books, 2011
Lorraine
Mariner
http://www.panmacmillan.com/book/lorrainemariner/furniture
Bye
For Now.
Rialto
Bridge Pamphlets No. 1, 2006
Furniture.
Picador, 2009
Fiona
Pitt Kethley
http://fionapitt-kethley.blogspot.co.uk/
Selected
Poems, Salt Publishing,
2008
Alicia
Winski
http://edgarandlenores.blogspot.co.uk/2010/09/author-alicia-winski.html
Running
On Fumes. Create Space, 2009
In
The Company of Women (Ed. with Apryl Skies). Edgar
& Lenore's Publishing House, 2012
Naughty
Girls Dream in Colour. Edgar
& Lenore's Publishing House, 2012
Michael
Woods
Paris
And The Surrealists (with George Melly). Thames
& Hudson, 1990
Puff
Ball (directed
by Nicolas Roeg). Dan Films/Yumi Media. 2007
Marie
Zorn
http://dreamorous.com/
Illustrations
by Michael Woods
Untitled
[front cover]
Arena
of Hearts [detail] Place Pigalle, Paris, collage assemblage with
Inesa-Barrington de la Roche
Sonia
Braga, montage-collage for Nicolas Roeg’s film Two
Deaths,
1995
Place
Pigalle, Paris, in-camera montage
Arena
of Hearts (Psyche ’63)
[detail] collage assemblage
Pilar
Reflecting on Herself, Carlton Arms Hotel, New York City, photo and
photo-collage
Passage
des Princes [Interior], Paris, 1987
Jardin
du Luxembourg, Paris, 1993
Passage
des Princes [Exterior],
Paris, 1987
Neon
Highway Poetry Magazine is edited by Jane Marsh and Alice Lenkiewicz.
Neon Highway was set up in 2002 as a non profit making little
poetry/arts magazine
Neon Highway (ISSN: 1476-9867)
Avant-garde
Literary journal
PUBLISHES:
POETRY and ART
Neon Highway is available bi-annually, with 2 issues costing £5.50, or a single Issue available at £3.00. Order your next issue by sending a cheque made out to Alice Lenkiewicz at 37, Grinshill Close, Liverpool, L8 8LD
Neon Highway (ISSN: 1476-9867)
Avant-garde
Literary journal
PUBLISHES:
POETRY and ART
Neon Highway is available bi-annually, with 2 issues costing £5.50, or a single Issue available at £3.00. Order your next issue by sending a cheque made out to Alice Lenkiewicz at 37, Grinshill Close, Liverpool, L8 8LD
Submissions
We prefer to receive work by snail-mail. Sometimes email is useful if your work format is 'experimental' or you have images and of course if you are abroad. For these reasons, email submissions will be accepted. On a general level, email submissions will only be read if we have time to, as we prefer to receive your works in the post. Please do not forget to enclose a sae for returns and replies and to write your name and address on all poems.
Alice Lenkiewicz
37, Grinshill Close, Liverpool, UK, L8 8LD
Email: neonhighwaypoetry@yahoo.co.uk
We prefer to receive work by snail-mail. Sometimes email is useful if your work format is 'experimental' or you have images and of course if you are abroad. For these reasons, email submissions will be accepted. On a general level, email submissions will only be read if we have time to, as we prefer to receive your works in the post. Please do not forget to enclose a sae for returns and replies and to write your name and address on all poems.
Alice Lenkiewicz
37, Grinshill Close, Liverpool, UK, L8 8LD
Email: neonhighwaypoetry@yahoo.co.uk